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Confidence Central

 

the blog

 

Does Clarity Create Confidence? (or Vice Versa)?

 

Lacking a life vision or purpose, can be at least unsettling. However, if you have a direction that you aren’t completely confident about, that is equally terrifying, perhaps even paralyzing.

Do you have a job that you really don’t like – even hate? I bet it challenges your confidence and you know it. But like many people, you may be justifying it with thoughts such as: “it’s a means to an end”, “I’m good at it”, “it’s...

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How To Use Self-Talk to Set Yourself Up For Success

 

Have you ever been in a situation where you were unsure of your abilities to do a certain task? Did you find that you were talking to yourself, either out loud or in your head? Does this “self-talk” often involve encouraging yourself with positive language (“I know I can do this/I’ve done it before, so I can do it again/I believe I can do this“)? Or does it involve negative encouragement (“I know I’m not good enough/I’m not worth it...

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I’m a Loser and Other Stories I tell Myself

 

Recently, I volunteered at the MA & RI Make-A-Wish Gala. I joked with other blue-badged Bostonians about being riff-raff and dining on the non-identifiable food served to us on the pre-event buffet.  After a very long day driving 8+ hours for personal reasons, I wasn’t completely fueled but still eager to support an organization I admire.

Prepped to answer questions about the auction-ready golf and Nantucket packages, the diamond raffle and catered celebrity chef dinner...

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Why We are Attracted to Confidence?

 

Confidence is attractive, right?

According to most people: yes.

Confidence continuously tops the lists of desirable traits in a romantic partner and was named by Forbes as one of the top three traits employers look for in prospective employees.

But why?

There’s a scientific reason why we are attracted to confidence. We’re social beings, so we look for cues from our environment on how to act, and cues from others on how we should treat them. That’s why ...

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Confidence and Constructive Criticism

 

Criticism can cut. And for some of us more than others. But if you don’t consider yourself good at taking feedback, there’s hope. Receiving constructive criticism is a learnable skill in and of itself, and confidence helps.

Why feedback hurts:
If criticism feels like a personal attack, it’s because your brain is probably in fight-or-flight mode. This means that a stress response causes your body to allocate all of your body’s energy towards self-preservation. And...

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Human See, Human Do – Mirror Neurons

 

Ever hear the phrase, “Monkey see, monkey do”? This is often used to describe the way monkeys (and people) seem to do things without understanding it. What’s interesting is that this phrase accurately describes Giacomo Rizzolatti’s experiment with macaque monkeys in 1992. In this experiment, Rizzolatti inserted tiny electrodes into the monkeys’ brains and observed their brain activity as the monkeys performed different activities.

Rizzolatti came to...

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The Cost of Being Overwhelmed

 

This time of year is always busy: End of the school year. Weddings. Graduations. Changing closets. Spring cleaning. Summer camp prep.  Vacation planning.  We must get everything all done so we can ‘enjoy’ and slow down for the summer … yeah sure.  Despite the finally glorious New England weather, I’m tired, overwhelmed and quite frankly, a little cranky.

Truth is, when are we not?  There is no “that time of year” anymore. There...

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Liar, Liar, Posts on Fire

 

Every time I see friends comment “I see from your social posts that you’re doing great and very busy“, I’m flattered and disappointed at the same time.

Shame on both of us. I admittedly only post brag-worthy stuff. Who doesn’t? My friends seemingly assume that’s my entire life status. We all do that, too. I feed the brand with acceptable online hype. They willfully buy it. It’s a huge contradiction when I tell audiences to not care so...

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Social Media Can Cause Confidence Cancer

 

Does it ever bother you that all you see on social media are photos of people looking absolutely “fantabulous”? Every time I see a picture of somebody in peak shape, with a massive crowd of friends at a party, or just doing something that seems impressive (or just really enjoyable), I feel less confident and sometimes depressed. Luckily, research shows that I’m not the only person who feels like this as a result of social media, especially in modern times where social...

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#1 Confidence Impostor: Cocky

 

Most people try to hide their shortcomings…especially when that shortcoming is a lack of confidence.  However, confidence isn’t something you can fake, and more often, when people try, they wind up overcompensating by being cocky.

“Cocky” is one of the behaviors we call a confidence impostor: it initially can appear to be confident but is actually false confidence that aims to impress at the expense of crushing other people’s genuine...

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